Kuch Luv Jaisa - Part 5

Smruti was sitting on the chair in the balcony of their apartment. It was a cool Sunday evening and the hot coffee in her hand was adding to the spice. A beautiful view of some parts of South Mumbai was visible through the balcony. And she always loved it…to have her coffee while silently observing the beauty of the crowded city.

She was silent. She was thinking about Samrat. It was getting very obvious that he has some feelings for her. Feelings which are beyond a teacher-student relationship. Feelings which make him find comfort in an altogether different relation. But can’t he see the fact that what he is thinking is beyond any possibility? She is a married woman with a four year old kid and also elder to him by almost ten years. In spite of this age difference and in spite of all the knowledge about her personal life, he continued to like her. And that was troubling her.

But there was one bigger thing which was troubling her more. And that was her mere acceptance of his behavior. She was not showing any kind of resistance towards him. She received almost all his calls, replied to all his messages, talked with him like a friend would talk. And all this, in spite of the knowledge that he was getting involved with her. This thing was troubling her. Why wasn’t she resisting? Why wasn’t she giving him clear signals that what he want is mere impossible and would never be a reality?

‘I think a doctor can have answers to almost all the questions of life.’ Dev came in the balcony and stood in front of her. ‘And that is the reason why, you need to tell me what are you thinking and why my dear wife is so puzzled today?’

She laughed. ‘I disagree. Every question doesn’t have an answer. And some questions are better left unanswered. Doctor, too, is a human after all. He can’t have all the answers.’

‘You know, Smruti, how beautiful you look when you smile than when you get immersed in deep thoughts?’ Dev sipped his coffee.

‘Thanks for that compliment. But it's brain. Who other than a psychiatrist can judge well about the functioning of the mind and brain? They have to work, they have to think! You can’t avoid thoughts.’ Smruti kept her mug on the small table near the chair.

‘That is true. But, on a serious note, what happened?’

‘Naah, nothing. Well, I want to tell you something. I might go to Chandigarh and Manali in January. It is our college IV, the Industrial Visit.’

‘Wonderful! So are you asking me for the permission?’ Dev said while smiling.

‘No, Mr. Deshpande. I am just informing you.’ Both smiled. Their conversations usually take a route of a very dramatic tone. And may be that was one of the reasons for their successful camaraderie so far.

‘But for how many days?’

‘May be a week.’

‘So I will have to stay without you for a week.’

‘That must not be a problem for you. You, anyway, love your patients more than me. I am feeling uneasy because I will have to stay without Rhea for a week.’

‘That was such a mean statement.’

‘It was sarcastic too.’ She smiled and winked.

At that very moment, Daaiji came there calling for Smruti. ‘Smruti, your student has come. The same boy…Samrat.’

Smruti got a pinch in her throat. She could not believe what Daaiji was telling her. Samrat had never been to her place before. This was the first time. She felt embarrassed but tried to hide her feelings.

‘Oh, is it? Tell him to have a seat. I will just come.’

Samrat tried to be comfortable in the living room area of Smruti’s apartment. The living room was very spacious and neatly kept. It did not have extra-ordinary interiors but the simplicity and the comfort was making it shine. Samrat saw a small corner which had a book shelf and lying there were plenty of books from computer science and fiction to medical science.

‘It is a mixture of engineering and medicine,’ said Smruti as she and Dev arrived in the living room. She saw Samrat going through the book shelf and observing them very keenly.

‘Sam, he is Dev…Dr. Dev Deshpande and Dev, he is Samrat Joshi, my favorite student.’ Smruti smiled. Samrat felt good on that compliment. Dev and Samrat shook hands. ‘I have heard a lot about you, Mr. Samrat. You are very popular in our family...for all good reasons though!’ Dev spoke keenly.

‘Oh, is it? You must be lying. But if it is true then I think it is my absolute pleasure. And yeah, just call me Sam, sir.’

‘Ok. Even you should call me Dev. 'Sir' makes me feel older. C’mon! I am not that old.’

Everyone started laughing. Daaiji brought some coffee for Samrat.

‘Have it, Sam. And say. How come you are here today?’ Smruti took an opportunity to ask about his surprise visit.

‘I had come to a friend’s place. He stays on the next lane to you. Then I thought, it would be even better if I could meet you and leave. Hope I have not disturbed you guys. It is a Sunday evening, after all and a good time to take rest.’

‘No, man. Not at all. We were just having some coffee and chatting while you came.’ Dev seemed to be impressed with Samrat’s talks. ‘So how is the final year going on? And yes, congratulations first of all! You got placed at Infosys, right?’

‘Yes, sir! Thanks a lot.’

‘No 'sir'!’

‘Ah! Sorry, Dev.’

‘That’s better. So how are the things?’

‘Pretty good. We are enjoying the last year. The seventh semester exams are going to start soon. We have an IV post exams. Did ma’am tell you about it?’

‘Yes, yes. We were talking about it just a few minutes back.’

Dev and Samrat got immersed in a deep conversation then. Somehow, it was making Smruti a bit uncomfortable. She was silently listening to their talks regarding their favorite football clubs, Samrat’s future plans, Dev’s demanding job and much more. She was just silently listening to it.

Rhea came from her friend’s house in the neighborhood. She came and stood near Smruti.

‘Sam, she is Rhea and Rhea, this is Sam. Remember, I told you about my favorite student?’

Samrat pulled Rhea’s soft cheeks. Rhea really liked Samrat. She went and sat beside him.

‘Which standard do you study?’ he asked her.

‘I am in junior KG now,’ she said. ‘This is just her first year at school.’ Smruti added.

Samrat had hit the jackpot. In the first meet itself, he had charmed almost everyone in Smruti’s family. Dev liked the way Samrat spoke. His witty speech and sense of humor did impress Dev. Rhea, too, got fond of Samrat. He dined with the Deshpande family that night. The dinner was really awesome. Samrat was all praise for Daaiji.

Finally, it was the time to leave. Smruti came near the society gate to leave Samrat.

‘It was a real good time for me today.’

‘For us too.’ Smruti said but with least enthusiasm. She was definitely not much comfortable with him getting too friendly with Dev and Rhea.

‘Didn’t you like it?’

‘What?’

‘That I came to your house. I found you a bit uncomfortable while I was talking to Dev.’

‘No, nothing like that.’

‘I understand you, ma’am.’

‘You don’t.’

‘I do. But I think you don’t understand what I think and feel for you.’

Smruti did not know what to say. She paused for a while and said, ‘You are thinking in a very wrong direction, Sam.’

‘I am thinking divine. Love is divine for me.’

‘It is not right. You are foolish. You just met my husband, my daughter. You are ten years younger to me and my student too. Can’t you envisage this reality?’

‘I do.’

‘Then? Why are you getting into things which are not possible?’

‘It is not a question of possibilities. I know how true my feelings are.’

‘Sam, you are losing your mind and yourself.’

‘I do not mind if it is for you.’ He smiled and left from there. Smruti stood there silently, looking at him until he was no more visible. She could not believe that he literally said these things just now. Her heart was beating faster. I don’t mind losing myself for you, he had said. Smruti could have slapped him on his face then and there. However, she didn't do it. Rather, she liked it…liked the way he told her about his feelings…liked the way he stood with pride and confidence, entirely unapologetic about what he is saying. Suddenly, the gap of ten years between them faded away for Smruti.

‘Love is divine. Yes, I am worshipping it!’ was the new status on Samrat’s facebook account. Pooja read it amongst her updates. She was not much surprised but still she decided to call him and ask about it. So far, he has never really hidden anything from her. She was sure that he will definitely tell everything about it to her soon. She called him.

‘Tell me.’

‘Read your status. I need an analysis and justification.’ Pooja said.

Samrat started laughing. Pooja always loved it when he laughed. His mere voice made her go crazy.

‘You know everything. Is anything hidden from you? If not you then who will know it?’

‘I didn't get it. What do you mean?’

‘I will talk to you later. Mom is here. Bye.’

He cut the call. But she got confused. He has never really talked about his feelings for Smruti with her. So what does that meant? You know everything. Is anything hidden from you? If not you then who will know it? What does it indicate?

Was he talking about Smruti, or me? Pooja thought. It can be me. Otherwise, he would have taken Smruti’s name or some hint about the person. What if it is really me? Thoughts started invading her mind and all of sudden she felt like dancing of joy.

She knew that it is yet not clear. But the mere thought of that person being she herself, made her think about him more.

Pichalye dino se…mujhko hua yun…

Khud mein rahun main khoyee…

Tanaha khayalon mein…karti huin baatein…darr hai sune na koi…

Hota hai jaise…nindhon mein bolna…

Baahon mein dolna…aankhon mein tolna…

Hone laga hai…jaane kyun aisa…

Kuch luv jaisa…mujhko ho raha…

She was happy. The destiny, however, was not in her favor. It is a rule of life. You can’t really get everything you want. Loving someone, perhaps, is one of the most dangerous things in life. If you get back the same love then it is a most pleasurable journey of a lifelong romance. But if you not, then it can lead you to darkness…an utter darkness which makes even the silver lining to fade away.

Kuch Luv Jaisa - Part 4

‘Guys, IV in January!!!’

Pooja came screaming at the top of her voice. Kunal, Rajashri and Samrat were waiting for her in the canteen. The Principal had called a meeting of all secretaries and councils during which he announced the news about an Industrial Visit of the final year students to Chandigarh and Manali. Pooja was one among the secretaries of the Student Council of QIT.

‘Wow! Do you mean Industrial Visit?’ Rajashri asked.

‘Of course! IV means Industrial Visit only! You’re such a book worm, Rajashri.’ Pooja said.

‘That’s such a fantastic news!’ Kunal.

‘Which one? Rajashri being a book worm or we will be going to IV!’ Samrat said while staring at Rajashri.

‘You people are so mean. I am leaving. And I will not come to IV also. You guys don’t leave a single moment to pull my leg.’ Rajashri tried to show some anger. But she could never really get angry at her group. She loved them more than herself.

‘I’m so sorry, Rajashri!’ Samrat pretended to apologize.

‘But guys, it is in January. We have much more to face before that. Remember? We have placements from tomorrow. At least, I haven’t started any preparation.’ Pooja reminded the group about their campus placements which were to begin from the next day. During such campus placements, many IT and non-IT companies visit the college campuses for hiring students from the final year of engineering. First few companies are supposed to be honey pots as they not only offer huge salary packages but are also the ones at the top of their game and famous.

‘That’s my biggest fear for now, Pooja. You guys are at least good in maths. I am not sure whether I would be able to crack the aptitude tests.’ Kunal got worried.

‘C’mon, Kunal! Don’t start crying now. You are in the final year, dude! It is not that we all are good at aptitude. We have today’s time to practice and study. Let us do it then.’ Samrat tried to ease the tension.

‘Sam, for you, it’s easy because you are really good at aptitude. But we are not. Anyway, you have a point though. Let us start studying immediately for the rest of the day.’ Pooja said.

‘Yes! Anyway, we, engineers, are used to the last day studies!’ Rajashri.

‘Look who is talking!’ Kunal said and Rajashri picked up the empty can of coffee and threw on him. Kunal started running and Rajashri followed him, leaving behind Pooja and Samrat at the table.

‘Hey Sam! IV will be fun, won’t it be?’

‘Most definitely! It will be rocking.’

‘Truth!’ Pooja kept staring at him. She always felt at ease whenever she was with Samrat. After all, they shared friendship since their childhood. But somehow, for her, this friendship has become really special. She has got used to being with Samrat. She loved to fight with him. And she loved when he used to mend the ways by apologizing first. Pooja knew that the relation was getting special. They are no more ten year old kids. Today they are 22 years old and easily ready to fall in a very special relation.

But she didn’t know what he felt for her. And that is the reason why she never dared to take the topic until she gets some hint from him. Is this love?, she thought.

She was not sure. She was getting attracted to him and she knew it. But she was not ready to accept the fact that she had started loving her best friend. She was scared to admit it to herself.

‘Hey, girl! Where are you?’ Samrat pinched her hand.

‘Na..nothing! I was just thinking about the time we will spend at Chandigarh!’

‘Hmm. But before that, we have to get our jobs at hand.’

‘Truth. Tell me how are you going to study?’

‘Aptitude tests have maths, logical and English. English should be easy for us. Let us focus on maths and logical part. There are many books for it. R S Aggarwal would be one of the best choices to begin with.’

And both of them got immersed in a conversation for the preparation.

The moment she reached home, she got a call from Kunal.

‘Hey baby, want to talk to you right now.’

‘Kunu, let me first enter my house. Can I call you later?’ Kunu was Kunal’s pet name.

‘No girl! I want to talk to you right now. I could have told you about it in the college itself but Sam was around you all the time. And after sometime, every one of us will get busy preparing for tomorrow. So let us talk right now.’

‘Ok. Tell me. What is it about?’

‘Have you observed Sam these days?’

Pooja got the point. She knew Samrat more than anyone else.

‘Why? What happened to him?’

‘Don’t pretend that you don’t know anything. C’mon!’

‘Please Kunu, be precise and clear.’

‘Don’t you think that he is thinking about Smruti ma’am a lot these days? I guess he is getting serious.’

Pooja skipped a heartbeat. But she tried to gather some words.

‘Oh! So what’s the problem in it? We all know that he has a crush on her.’

‘Girl! This is serious. It is alright when we joke amongst ourselves. But when it gets a bit more than that to the extent that he calls her every night before sleeping, then it’s a cause to worry. He looks a bit lost these days. He tries to find her in every single woman around him. Do you know what I mean?’

‘Yes, I know!’

‘He doesn’t even look at girls of his age around.’

‘Haha..that was good. I know about it too.’

‘See, you know everything. I suggest you talk to him once. There is only one person to whom he can open up his mind and his heart. And it is only you, girl!’

‘Hmm.’

‘So?’

‘Ok. Don’t worry. I will talk to him. I think we should get back at our preparations right now. Tomorrow is the D day man.’

‘Sure. Just let me know if you talk to him.’

‘Sure.’

She cut the call. She knew all the things which Kunal told her. But somehow she was not to ready to comprehend. She was not sure whether Samrat was really getting serious about Smruti. But now, after talking to Kunal, she was getting pretty sure.

She lost all the interest in getting prepared for the placements the next day.

The next day began with a lot of excitement. Everyone was in a formal attire to appear for the aptitude tests and ready to grab their first job offer. Infosys was the first company to start the roll. Patni, TCS, Cognizant were also ready with their pre-placement talks. QIT was easily one of the best colleges in Mumbai. It had many takers in the recruitment domain. Samrat was busy arranging his certificates and resume when Smruti arrived there.

‘Sam, go fast. The aptitude test is just about to begin. Run!’

‘Oh! Yea..yes. I am just going.’ Samrat closed his file.    

‘By the way, you look really handsome in formals.’ She looked at him and winked.

That was it. Samrat didn’t feel like moving from there. He blushed like anything.

‘Go, Sam and stop blushing. All the best!’ Smruti literally pushed him.

‘Thanks, ma’am. I will see you right after the test. Want to tell you something.’

‘Yeah yeah, go now!’

Samrat left from there. Smruti smiled to herself. The picture of Samrat blushing reappeared in front of her.

The aptitude tests were over for the day. And the selected students were waiting for the interviews to begin. Some dull and upset faces roamed around as not clearing the aptitude test was a big shock. Samrat, Pooja, Kunal and Rajashri, all four of them, had cleared the test. Now they were hoping to be together for the same company. Kunal couldn’t believe that he has cleared the test and was really happy. But the fate had some different story to tell. Kunal was selected for Patni’s interview while Rajashri was shortlisted for Cognizant’s interviews. Samrat and Pooja struck with a coincidence. Both were selected for Infosys’s interview.

There was still half an hour for the interviews to begin. Rajashri, Kunal and Pooja were busy going through their resumes. Samrat was pretending to read his file but he was looking for Smruti. Pooja observed it.

At that very moment, Smruti came there.

‘Hey ma’am!’ said Rajashri.

‘I will not disturb you guys much. I just want to tell that now it’s just a small road ahead. Clear it with the same intensity with which you all cleared the first round. All my best wishes with you. Love you all.’

‘Thank you, ma’am!’ every one said in unison.

Smruti and Samrat exchanged the glances.

Smruti left from there. Samrat stood up and followed her. Rajashri and Kunal looked at each other and then at Pooja. Pooja, however, was looking at Samrat who left his file on the table and ran behind Smruti to talk her. She got immersed in her thoughts.

‘Ma’am, thanks for that compliment in the morning!’

‘You are most welcome, Sam!’ she said while not looking at him and busy organizing files and papers on her table.

‘Ma’am, the interview is just going to begin. I am a bit nervous.’

‘Oh c’mon! Sam, you don’t need to be nervous. The interview will be a cake-walk for you. I am pretty sure about it. Just be yourself and answer.’

‘Hmm. Fingers crossed! Thanks, ma’am , for this encouragement.’

‘You don’t need to be. My wishes are always with you.’

‘I love you, ma’am!’

She looked at him. He was smiling. She was stunned. Before she could say anything, Kunal came from behind and shouted, ‘Sam, hurry up! The interviews have begun. Come fast!’

He looked at Kunal and looked back at Smruti and left from her cubicle.

Smruti’s jaws dropped. She didn’t know what to say. She was literally shivering as the words came very unexpectedly and in a way which was impossible for her to comprehend. She sat still for some time.

The interviews were over. There were almost two rounds of interviews namely technical and HR. Everyone was waiting to hear the results. It was almost 10 pm. The list was supposed to be displayed any time around. Smruti was also waiting at the college that day as she was a part of the placement council. Rajashri was almost about to faint as she had no more patience to wait any longer. Her interview, she said, was not really good. Kunal and Pooja were relaxed. Samrat was not much excited. He was thinking about the thing which happened at Smruti’s cubicle before he left for the interview.

And the news broke. The lists were put up.

All four of them had got it! Pooja was at the top of the world since she will be with Samrat for some more time now. Both of them were selected for Infosys. Rajashri was selected for Cognizant whereas Kunal got placed at Patni. There was a great cheer. A majority of the students were placed on the first day of placements. And the students who didn’t get anywhere, didn't have to worry much. There were two more days of placements ahead.

Kunal, Rajashri, Pooja and Samrat cheered together, 'HIP HIP HURREY!'

Smruti was looking at their students from a distance. She had a big smile on her face, especially to see these four friends cheering. They have got a job now.

Everyone came and hugged their Smruti ma’am. ‘It would not have been possible without your support, ma’am. I love you so much!’ Pooja got tears in her eyes. Smruti wiped off the tears and said, ‘Guys, it’s all your efforts. You don’t even know how happy I am at this moment. You guys are very special to me.’

‘Ma’am, will you come for the IV?’ Kunal asked.

Suddenly, there was a silence in the air. Smruti showed a hesitation on her face. Samrat thought that the answer was NO especially since what happened in the morning that day. Everybody was silent and looking at each other. Everyone wanted her to say a yes.

‘Yes, guys, I will be coming for the IV!’

‘Wow! HIP HIP HURREY!!’ cheered everyone as Smruti said it. Almost everyone started dancing with joy to hear that their favorite Smruti ma’am will be coming with them for the IV.

Samrat was blushing. Smruti looked at him. He smiled. So did she.

Pooja went through this exchange of expressions. Her excitement dropped suddenly. But she wore a big smile on her face. She said loudly, ‘Cheers!’.